That's right. I finished! I almost didn't but I finished!
Many evenings, quite like this one, I forced myself to sit in front of the computer with lots of whining involved. Lots of it.
Excuses I've used in the past 30 days to not post:
"I'm too tired."
"I'm too tired AND my feet hurt too much to walk over to the computer wah."
"I already posted." (those days where I try to convince myself that it's not a lie)
"James is on the computer again OH WELL guess I can't post today."
and my personal favorite which happened about 4 out of 7 days a week...
"It's like after 10pm.. no one will ever notice.."
Or maybe I would trying to convince myself that no one would notice a missed post. Who knows. Who cares. But dammit I did it and I'm sort of proud of myself.
November was fucking hectic. Super fucking hectic and I still managed to pull it off- with new full time gig and everything.
So yeah! How about that? November started out looking pretty grim. I still felt hope but I was starting to lose it. But with each daily post things were a changin'. I still can't believe that I'm working full time again. I still can't believe the amount of support that my family has received. I also still can't believe that we are finally on a path towards a new and pretty secure future.
Look, my new job doesn't pay a lot. It's not glamorous (or as my new boss says, "it's not sexy"), but I don't think about it the same way (maybe?) someone else would. I make enough to pay more than half of our bills which is a huge accomplishment for us. Rick's old job sort of paid the bills but without going into details due to the fact that I don't really know how much I should put out there, let's just say that we'll know exactly how much money to expect each month to come in. We'll be able to budget again. Finally. We'll know ahead of time if rent will be late or the electric bill will be paid late. At least we'll know ahead of time so we can plan. That I can say.
Rick is looking for work so anything that he can find within the next month would help A LOT. I know that he'll find something. He's very determined and now more than ever.
He's had a few weeks away from working outside of the home to realize more of his goals.
A goal that he and I remain to share.
I planned to sign up for spring classes and gosh I hope I can. And if I can't well there's the fall. As long as I'm busting my ass making money and contributing some sort of income then I can't beat myself up. My goals have always been put on a temporary hold- never ever permanent.
The same goes for Rick.
I'm only mentioning all of this again (such a broken record I am) because we remind ourselves everyday of what we want to be doing. Will I be scrubbing toilets and mopping floors forever? Nope. Will I stick with my company for the long haul? You betcha.
They are giving me an opportunity that so many other places wouldn't give. Why? I don't know and never will.
But I am lucky...very lucky to have this job and have the support system that has kept me from jumping off a cliff. And I can actually say... that I'm proud of myself and so proud of my family.
And that? is my last post for "National Blog Posting Month". ;)