Friday, July 9, 2010

the post in which I pretend to be a real reviewer of random things.

Every single time I use a new product I critique it.
I critique it a lot and can be very easily swayed if the I'm certainly no different than most people because I think we all do that just about everyday. We all love being able to share our own opinions and perspective on everything. I've always believed that the most outgoing person would love giving their run-down of must-see films just as much as the most introverted person on Netflix, for example. It's all the same. Wow, where the heck am I going with this? Ah yes! I've tried some interesting new products lately and want to throw out, throw in, whichever way you look at it.. two cents.

Remember this post?

Well guys, I am disappointed. Tsk tsk.
I was all excited to try it out.. I rushed Natalie with her breakfast that following morning after the purchase.
I rushed her for nothing.
First of all, I am so rough with these new fangled things.. you know... opening pen-shaped containers with paint in it. I managed to get it open, with my hands shaking from excitement and all, and grabbed a napkin to start the flow of nail paint by pushing down on the tip of the pen. Nail paint went everywhere all over our white kitchen counter. Looked like a scene from "No Country For Old Men".
So, I put a coat of dark polish on Natalie. She specifically asked for "hearts and horsies and smiley faces and butterflies with ladybugs and a bee or sumfing". I managed to bring her down to smiley faces thank god.
It all looked pretty and shiny for a few hours. And then I noticed that she was scratching off the design like this stuff was "peel off" paint.
For 7 bucks, this product was not worth it. By the end of the day, the designs all rubbed off.
Sharpies, from experience, would win in a fight. 

On the flipside, there is a nail polish I purchased that same night and was just as giddy to apply. I love painting my toes. I show my hands more but pay more attention to my toes. I don't understand it either. Hmm.
Well then...
So this product is my ultimate new favorite nail polish. Specifically in this color called "wined up"... mmmm wine..
Isn't that hawt??!!
Two reasons that every mom should love this: fast dry that really is fast dry AND it doesn't chip.
Well, yet anyway. I applied it 2 weeks ago and it still hasn't chipped. It cost about 4 bucks and some change. I am hooked.

The next product I tried a few days ago is one that caught my attention a few weeks while featured on an infomercial. And let me just say this about infomercials.. I love them. I love the cheesiness of it all.. the "oh wow.. isn't that amazing folks?" and the supposed creator of the product all excited and reading off of their cue cards.. I love seeing their eyes roll side to side while reading said cards.. it's all so exciting.
I saw this product a few weeks ago and HAD TO HAVE ONE:

First off, it's named after a super-cool dinosaur. Anything named after Yoshi has my full attention.
I have the worst set of knives at home. I cook alot, especially cutting tons and tons of veggies for salads and I needed a knife that was different, looked really cool, not a cleaver, and something that will last.
This sucker is ceramic..CERAMIC.. and aside from the cool "as seen on tv" label, it included a ceramic peeler (which I also needed because I'm too lazy to head over to the dollar store). It's okay that the infomercial pretty much only shows women chopping up stuff..I get it I get it. That's totally fine. I wanted it because of the price (about 15 bucks) and I was so sick of sawing my veggies. My old knives, I knew, wouldn't stand a chance against this thing.
And I am impressed!
Here's what I like about the Yoshi: it's light, it's made of CERAMIC, the price is right, and it cuts really well. That sucker is really sharp. And so is the peeler. It's also supposed to stay sharp for life.
We'll just have to see about that.
What I don't like about it: that I couldn't cut through watermelon rind and I'm supposedly not allowed to use it for cutting meats with bone. It will break the knife. We eat alot of boneless meats anyway, so it's not really a huge deal. It's dishwasher safe but I still hand wash it. I'm so scared of shattering this knife. It's my preeecious.
But all in all, it was a pretty kick ass wedding anniversary present from the hubby. He understands what to get me.
Finally, this product:
The Pillow Pets. 
When this commercial comes on, both kids stop whatever they are doing (literally they drop what they are doing..something I can't even get them to do) to sing along to the song... "It's a's a's a pillow pet!!" I gotta hand it to you advertising execs.. you know what you are doing.
They jump up down and scream and squeal and run and sing and jump... 
It's all insane. Annoying.
We keep bribing them with these for when they have fully mastered the potty. Natalie loves the idea..James, not so much. Well, oh well then James. Although, I think that means we found his potty holding out weakness but it's too early to say really. 
We made a brief trip to the place that I hate the most... THE Mall. 
It actually ended being a nice trip because it has a "caraself" which is "carousel" in Natalie language..but it always comes out as sounding like "kill mah self". 
Oh well. 
So, we stopped at a kiosk that was selling... get this.... spot the difference here... "Pillow PALS".
We explained ahead of time to the kiddies that we were there to just look and touch but to not buy ..and naturally the Natalie hurricane began. I managed to get a good look at these Pillow Pals while she screamed for mercy and noticed that they are not as cool as the real deal. 
These knock-offs couldn't be thrown into a washer.
Well fuck that. 
So, we left explaining that if they get a new pillow they need to be able to put snot, puke, juice, all of the above on it and I need to be able to wash it. What's the point if it can't be washed?? By December I'd be so tempted to thrown them out. 

So there you go. My two cents that nobody asked for.

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