How's it ..uhh..hanging?
Okay, here's the deal, I am sorry. I am sorry sorry sorry. I put you through torture these past 4 years and I can't bare to think about how you're feeling. I feel shame for making you push out 2 very large-headed 8 pound children. But I know that if made my doctors perform C-sections, you may not have liked that much better.
I love you uterus. Don't hate me.
I'm hoping that you've enjoyed your almost 3 year "vacation". I know I sure have. And beings that the last time you pushed out Natalie a nice swelling infection happened. I would apologize but I think the nurse who helped deliver Natalie (and talked on her cell phone) still owes you an apology. So, as you know, since then, you've been letting me know that something strange is going on in there. With the twinges of pain at random times, my pelvis popping, and freaking me out..I'm hearing your call for help. Help me help you.. Well, the doctors will.
So, in 2 weeks, don't be alarmed at the cameras and a light coming in to visit you..they're there just for a quick look-see. Please behave that day..and just do what a uterus would do. Also, this procedure just may be the only way a mama can get a nap around here.
I have appreciated the pleasant periods that you've been giving me. Honest. Because before I had those big headed kids, I was always doubled over in pain every month. For the past few years you have been very kind to me. Although making it last 8 days now isn't nice, but I'll take that over pain any day.
I love you uterus. Just keep enjoying your vacation. *uterus hugs*